Skip to main content
Category

funny

By funny

December 13, 2017

By fresh air, funny, inspiration

May 12, 2016

By fresh air, funny, inspiration

October 6, 2017

By advice, funny

if you’re in a sports bar but don’t understand sports just keep repeating the phrase “damn they gotta get him the ball.” everyone will agree

September 23, 2016

By fresh air, funny

am i anxious? yes. but is that going to stop me from doing things i love? also yes

September 23, 2016

By funny

-Do you have any kids?

-Nah I’m more of a dog person.

February 22, 2015

By funny

“i was born in the wrong generation” i say as i steal my grandkids hoverboards because fuck you i was promised these years ago

September 14, 2014

By fresh air, funny

“Don’t kid yourself” would be a great slogan for birth control pills

September 10, 2014

By funny

i love birthdays they’re so motivational like if i can manage to keep myself alive for another year ill get money and cake

August 20, 2014

By funny

this is your captain speaking, AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING.

August 14, 2014

By funny

Diane is stealing seats. Dump her ass in the ocean.

August 5, 2014

By fresh air, funny, non sequitur

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like “I don’t know how to hold a pencil”

July 25, 2014

By advice, fresh air, funny

Single and ready to reply with sarcastic remarks to any form of affection because that’s the only way I know how to mingle

July 24, 2014

By fresh air, funny

We are gathered here today because SOMEBODY *glares at coffin* couldn’t stay alive.

July 24, 2014

By funny

reasons why babies are not needed

  • head to body ratio is uneven

  • when was last time baby contribute to dinner time conversation

  • baby unable to hunt for the clan

  • baby is slow and usually racist

July 24, 2014
Close Menu